Soft Power  – Women for Women

Happy International Women’s Day!

For many decades of my life, I thought it was easier to get along with men. They were easier to deal with,  generally wanting to please and fun. Women on the other hand were difficult – conniving, jealous, checking me out to figure me out, competitive.

And that right there – was not my problem alone. It has been the problem of many women and continues to be so. But let me express how this way of being, has perpetuated the centuries old degradation of women, and empowered patriarchal structures to the level that they have been. We were forced many centuries ago, to depart from the women for women, and women with women attitude and power because it was threatening to the masculine, the power mongers, and the elite. If women were self-sufficient, and could not just support each other, but heal each other and provide for each other, then what would the men do? How will they be important to the world? The ability to help us procreate could only get them that far.

And so began the witch hunts. Many powerful women leaders, teachers, priestesses, and healers were burned at the stake, beaten, abused, raped and jailed for life. There began a slow and steady spread of fear, degradation, and hatred of women. Through the capitalistic systems, money became the all-important commodity, and the ones who had the money or earned the money became all powerful. The men went out to work, and therefore got money for their services from the capitalistic structures. This led to the formation of a power elite and a masculine dominated society, Men started to become the heads of households instead of the women. Women who were the real providers, and did the important work of nurturing, and caring for the children and the elderly, healing the sick through their use of natural medicine, growing and cooking wholesome food, performing sacred rituals to connect with the divine, for the well-being of all, were made to feel that they were of no value. Money became the source of power, and women were left out of the capitalistic money structures. And so we became dependent on the men, to provide us the money for our and the family’s needs. We became disempowered. The wealthier a man was, the more a woman wanted to be with him, and therein started the women compete with women system. In order to survive, we had to use our life force, our sexuality to manipulate, connive and attract a wealthy and powerful mate to ourselves.

It’s time to take back our power

It is time for us women to understand that in lawful, abundant, and healthy societies, women are the heads. Feminine power and wisdom is far healthier in leadership roles than the way our current capitalistic systems and structures have been set up, where a masculine dominant, hierarchical system of leading has been at the helm. How many wars has our world seen in this system? How many pandemics and natural disasters have we witnessed? How much female infanticide has this society been privy too? All of these imbalances in the world are because of a disrespect for feminine values, abilities and powers.

A shift in paradigm

In the last century, women have attempted to equalise this gap by becoming more like men. We have tried to be equal, demanding, dominant, aggressive, invulnerable, perfect – the result of which has been burnout, stress and disease in our physical bodies. We have been taught to think and believe that we are only powerful if we are leaders in the capitalistic structures. We are ashamed if we are householders, or in roles that are more supportive in nature, such as nursing, coaching, counselling. Covid has been a wake-up call to the importance and power of these supportive roles. It took me a long time to stop wanting to be a corporate success and recognize that my power and abilities were best used in a role such as coaching. I feel no less powerful or impactful than my successful female leaders in the corporate world. In fact, I support and empower many of them in being more successful in these positions, by taking ownership of their feminine essence and power.

I am calling out to my women friends today – we will not become equal to men, by being like them. We will only be equal to men, by recognising and understanding where our power lies, and our power lies in attitudes and behaviours that are supportive of the following feminine values in life and leadership.

Community – first and foremost. It was in the gathering of women, the coming together, that the feminine feels most nurtured and supported. As natural givers, when we are not with other women, we tend to be giving of our energy – to our mates, our teams, our managers, our children and to the world at large. It is only when we gather as friends, as sisters, as supporters of each other, that we are resourced well enough to give more, without burning out. We come into balance.

Authenticity – Getting in touch with our real selves, instead of pretending to be something we are not, as defined by what society or the patriarchal systems have conditioned us to believe.

Vulnerability – Leaning in for support, asking for help. Accepting and knowing when and how to do that.

Self Esteem – Build your own and help build others self-esteem.

Emotional well-being – Resourcing well

Empathy/ Compassion/ Forgiveness – towards self and others

Collaboration – across all areas of life

Facilitative leadership vs directive leadership

Acknowledgment and validation – of ourselves and others

Inclusivity

Influence / Soft Power

Direct and respectful communication

Communal good vs individual good

Going far vs getting ahead

Creativity and innovation vs cookie cutter approach

Flexibility vs Strict rules

Intuition and Inspiration

If you are looking to join a meaningful, empowering sisterhood – consider joining my women’s circle From Spirituality to Sensuality, a sacred and empowering gathering, where we will learn more about all the above and loads more!